That sounds like good name for a band. Or maybe it’s a really bad one. What do I know? I kind of like it though. Maybe there is already a band. I’m not looking it up.
I felt that I should provide a bit of an update as I have now posted twice about my kid.
It is not ideal… but nothing ever is, is it? Cinderella notwithstanding. (Although, is her situation really ideal? Running off and marrying a guy she just met? Seems risky.)
He was nervous on his way to school yesterday. He was also half asleep as he did not sleep well the night before. But then, he’s always kind of half asleep on his way to school. He does not enjoy waking up at 6:30.
For all his fears of having no friends because of the bully’s popularity, he was okay. He still isn’t so thrilled to be around this kid, but they hang out with the same people so that’s hard to avoid unless he doesn’t hang out with those guys at all. But he tells me he really doesn’t have anyone else to be friends with. He even said, “It’s not like I have a choice.” He doesn’t want to jump to being an outsider with another group. At least with this one, he’s less of an outsider.
He still wishes he had a best friend. And I really hope he finds one. Will it be one of these kids? I’m guessing no.
He texted me after school yesterday. (They are not, of course, allowed to use their phones during school. When I was a kid, it was passing notes. Now, phones. Damn, I am old.) Anyway, he said that one of the other guys told him, “Bully [not his real name] was being a jerk.” And later, one of the other guys said something similar.
And the next text was him letting me know he was going to the park again. I was a bit shocked after the level of upset he was on Friday. I didn’t know until later that the bully was with them. He didn’t do anything this time… I wonder if the other guys told him (the bully) that he was being an asshat. In their own words. I have no idea.
I apologize for my level of anxiety over this. I think it directly ties to the amount of tears I saw my son shed Friday afternoon. He literally curled up in a ball on his bed and cried. He’s never done that in his life. But… I apologize nonetheless. I embarrass myself a lot. Please don’t hold it against me. I hate that about me. I was only partially justified, I guess. Hell, I still worry about the potential of something happening again. But that’s me… overthinking and overworrying and overpanicking (and making up words). I still feel responsible for him not being fully part of the group… for him feeling a bit left out because of where we live and because of me being overcautious about him hanging out around town. But at least he doesn’t feel completely excluded.
I hope to hell this is over… that the jerkface doesn’t start up again. I admire my kid for going to the park yesterday. I think he showed the jerk that he wasn’t going to be chased away after Friday.
Still horrified (about me, not my kid),
©2017 what sandra thinks