Stream of Consciousness Saturday.
No editing is allowed… (painful for me… I usually proofread a post 20 times…)
This week, the prompt is ‘save/safe‘…
I know I can be overprotective. Maybe it’s not even just that I can be. Maybe I just am. I worry way too much. (And I know I’ll always worry about my kids no matter how old they are.) But I don’t know if I make the right decisions. Am I justified? Overprotective? Mean? Or am I just keeping them safe?
Yesterday, my daughter (who is 9) was invited to go to an amusement park sort of place for some Halloween fest thing with a friend and her parents. This would be at night. You know, after dark, of course, because of the Halloween thing. And it’s about 45 minutes away.
My husband said no. And I don’t feel good about her going either. Hell, neither of us would feel good about my son going either and he’s 12. But are we being overprotective? Are we being unreasonable?
I feel bad because I’m sure other parents would just let their kid go. I don’t want my kid(s) to be known (or picked on) for not being able to do stuff because their parents are overprotective. Apparently, this is something my son has already been teased about. I’m also concerned that my daughter’s friend will just ask someone else and they’ll go and have lots of fun and my daughter will feel left out… because of her overprotective parents. And then kids will talk… and no one will ever invite her to do anything again because they’ll remember this… they’ll remember how her parents said no.
I want my kids to be ‘normal‘… I want them to be able to do what other kids do. I already feel bad about things we haven’t been able to do… I already feel like my kids miss out. So I want to say yes to things like this. But it concerns me. I worry about her safety. I met the dad once. I’ve talked to the mom a few times but as I suck at making friends, I don’t know her well. But if I only let my kids hang out with kids whose parents I know well, they’d have no friends at all.
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My son is a straight A student. He always has been. He rarely even gets an A-. However, this year (and school only started 5 weeks ago), he has gotten a couple of really bad grades in what used to be his best subject. I’ve asked him what’s going on… Did he know the material? (He says yes.) Was he distracted? (He says no.) Is something else entirely bothering him? (He says no.)
So what then? I don’t know. He’s already told me that he’s going to be devastated if he doesn’t make High Honors (it would be the first time ever not making it). But I don’t think he can save his grade. Not enough to get the A. His most recent grade, from a quiz he said was “the easiest thing ever” was significantly better but still a good bit lower than is normal for him… especially considering that he thought it was so easy.
I don’t think there’s something else going on that he’s not telling us because this is the only class where his grade is significantly lower than usual. But I’m sad for him because he’s sad. I want to fix it for him, but obviously, I can’t. I have a theory about this… why it’s happening. Last year, he had one teacher he kind of hated. He did slightly worse in that class than all the others (still an A, though). This year, the class of the bad grades is also the one with the teacher he kind of hates. Obviously, there’s a connection. But it’s much worse now.
• • • • •
It feels like failure… on my part. I don’t know how protective or not protective to be… maybe I’m just always overprotective. And I don’t know how to help my son. I just want them to be happy. And safe. But I feel pretty useless. And it all makes me sad.
©2017 what sandra thinks