Stream of Consciousness Saturday.
No editing is allowed… (painful for me… I usually proofread a post 20 times…)
This week, the prompt is ‘ink‘…
I could go in a couple of directions with this one. Maybe I won’t limit it to one…
I am still having some trouble with ink. You know… writing. I thought I was coming out of it but now I can’t clear my head. Maybe it’s the lack of peace. I’ve been moody (and sad) as hell when alone… but now that the husband and kids are home for a few days, I feel like I can’t think straight. I can’t fall into a groove… with writing. Or anything else. But… I bet that when they go back to school/work, I’ll be a mess again. Alone and lonely… bored and anxious.
What is wrong with me?
Men with ink are sexy as hell. I have no idea why… but it’s incredibly attractive to me. I have a little. Very little. I always wanted more but I should have done it years ago. Now I feel that I should not spend the money on it… although I still want it. But really… when the hell do I spend money on myself? Almost never.
Back to men. Lately, my every thought goes back to men. Sorry. I just love them. Oh hell, I’m not sorry. I want one (or more).
Yeah, I know… I have a husband. Maybe I’m a horrible person. Actually, there’s really no doubt about that. I am a horrible person. But I need more attention and affection than I get from him. And more love. I don’t like to talk about it because I think it somehow reflects on me. Like there’s something wrong with me. Is there? I don’t know. He did grab my ass yesterday. It was kind of a shock… because lately… ugh.
Anyway… (wow, talking about that really does make me feel like there’s something wrong with me. I need to talk about something else).
It’s bothering me that I haven’t posted much lately. Damn, I really thought I was coming out of this horrible block. But I already feel stuck again. I felt better for, like, a day and a half. And of course it was during the holiday when I couldn’t write… which sucks.
I hate this post. Maybe someday I will be back… for real. Maybe not.
And one last thing… which was actually the first thing I thought of when I read the theme for this week. How could I possibly end this post without adding this song…? It’s called ‘Ink‘ by Coldplay. It’s a masterpiece. (And I’m pretty sure I’ve posted it before…)
©2017 what sandra thinks