When I first started blogging, I wasn’t sure what I was doing but I always knew I wanted to share some fiction. I shared a few short scenes… but it took me a while to finally publish my first ‘fiction friday’ post. (And above is the original logo I created for it.) That first post was intended to stand alone… I wasn’t going to share the whole story. That’s why the timeline in that series is confusing (that’s always bugged me). I wouldn’t have started with that scene. But I did share the rest… because it seemed like readers wanted the rest of the story… and kept wanting it.
I was flattered… and overcome with shock and surprise and amazement. I’ve always loved my own writing. (Not in an egotistical way… I don’t think. I just love writing it… and reading it… getting lost in it… and even editing it.) But I never thought others would think it was any good. I spent my entire writing-life assuming I was just writing romantic drivel (and some naughtier stuff) that would never appeal to anyone but me. It took a lot of self-convincing for me to be able to share any of it.
Seventy-two posts and over a year and a half later, here I am at number 73. But this isn’t fiction. So I guess I’m cheating.
From the very first ‘fiction friday‘ post (and before that), I’ve been afraid of making promises I couldn’t keep. I didn’t know if I’d be able to keep it going. I never thought I would have enough to post… enough stories to share… enough quality writing. I’m stunned that I’ve been doing it this long.
As I’ve mentioned recently, I’m having a bit of an inner struggle over posting fiction. I’ve also mentioned the anxiety I feel over the mere thought of publishing. These thoughts are contradictory. Do I hold back posting any fiction I may someday try to publish? But… what’s the point if I’m never going to have the courage to try to publish anyway?
The point of this post is… I think ‘fiction friday‘ might be going on a little hiatus. Wait… don’t leave! I know some of you might be here just to read fiction… but I hope you won’t disappear. I’m not even sure about this hiatus. I may be back next week. Or the week after. I haven’t figured it out yet. I do have a few writing projects floating around in notebooks and in my head. But they’re not ready for general consumption. Maybe I’ll work on those. Maybe I’ll participate in this challenge my friend Marquessa Matthews started. I wanted to… but then I became obsessed with my Christmas card designs.
As you can see… I have no idea what I’m going to do with ‘fiction friday‘. I just know that I don’t have any fiction to share today and I feel bad about that because I hate disappointing people.
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