I just want to talk.
Being alone with my racing roller-coaster thoughts never ends well. Sometimes it feels like it’s never going to end at all. It sucks. That’s a fucking revelation. It sucks.
I have never been a girl with tons of friends. And I prefer it that way. But here… in my life – my physical-human-interaction-offline life – I wish I had a friend. One… or two… maybe three. But even one. I’m totally good with one.
Back in college, I had a few amazing friends. [And one I thought was my ‘best friend’ (part 1, part 2)… but that was all kinds of wrong.] I’ve long since lost touch – and geographical closeness – with all of them. After graduation, I made a few new friends. Mostly through others… through means by which I did not have to initiate anything… because I’ve always sucked at that. Maybe that’s why every friend I’ve ever had has been at least a little (often a lot) more outgoing than I am.
But life takes people in a million different directions and none of them landed here with me. And I fucking hate it. I’m not asking for the world. Just one. One coffee-drinking, secret-sharing friend. I miss it. The laughing and the crying and the laughing-so-hard-we’re-crying. I miss the always-there-for-me with an ear, with a smile, with brutal honesty, with a kick in the ass (as needed)… and with a big fat hug.
I am so over loneliness. I miss having a friend.
Because I just want to talk.
what sandra thinks 
I do feel for you …
(But no plans to relocate) 😞
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Thank you… of course if I was where you are, I wouldn’t relocate either… Since over there, I could just go sit on a park bench and listen to strangers talk for pleasure… (sucker for that accent…)
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Park benches a bit bleak today … you forgot the British climate xx
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Well… It snowed a little here yesterday so I think I’m okay with what you’ve got there! Or I can just sit in the corner of a pub and listen to people there…
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*sends magic carpet*
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I’m afraid of heights. I’m going to need something a bit more enclosed… Ha!
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For you .. the Lear jet
(Tho not as good at time travel!)
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True!
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If I relocate you’ll be the first to know
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Very good because I’ll need you to help me hide the body. Also very good for several other reasons… also involving bodies.
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I wished we lived closer… Although we might end up in jail!
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But if we’re roomies in the big house, I bet it would still be fun. Plus plenty of time to read… and write. And learn to knit ponchos.
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Oh that’s brilliant! Do they let you have knitting needles in prison? Maybe the plastic kind!
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Well… Martha did it… in her minimum security women’s correctional facility. You know, cushy jail. By the way… I don’t even know how to knit. Will have to learn that…
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I can’t knit either… Something tells me we’d end up in supermax anyway.
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Clearly, we’ll need better help hiding the bodies…
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Hahaha! Sandra I picture us as Lucy and Ethel trying to commit crime! 😀
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That’s about right!
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😂😂😂
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I worked in jail and no, no knitting needles! And if you find one in there, do not touch it!!
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But Martha! And the minimum security place! You worked in jail? What did you do there?
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If it made it into jail, it made it there by an icky, icky means. Lol.
I was a social worker, working with youth ages 12-21, in the substance abuse and mental health units. I then managed those two living units. That was about 13 years ago, and I worked there for 10 years.
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I don’t think I could ever handle a job like that! Very interesting, though.
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Yikes!
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Aww Sandra! I wish I lived closer to you! 😦
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Me too. Of course, I’m totally too old for you. Oh wait, what am I saying? I’m only 29!
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Lol yes you are only 29 so its all good. But i have always been called an old soul “she was 7 going on 27” has been uttered by the mama on more than 100 occasions haha.
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I definitely have no trouble acting younger than I am… I think it would all work out… 🙂
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Now to just move…..im not sure about the US right now. How do you feel about both of us relocating? I hear Belize is nice?
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I’m not sure about the US right now either! But I’m sure we could find a suitable place…
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Aww, I wish I lived closer, but I’m too old for you. But if you’re learning to knit, make me a hat, please! It’s so cold here already!
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Age definitely doesn’t matter! In my early 20s… I worked at a medical facility and my best friend was a nurse there… she was more than 25 years older… and we had a blast together! I really do want to learn to knit… and I’d totally make you a hat if I could! And the cold… we had some snowflakes yesterday… too soon!
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We may see some this weekend, pooh! Although I guess it’s time, almost December!
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We don’t usually get much of anything until Jan/Feb… last year, we hardly got any at all. The year before, I think, was the ridiculous year where we had, like, 9 feet or more for the winter…!
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I relate so much to this! I’ve made online made real life friends, and I wouldn’t trade them for the world. But it sure would be nice if they didn’t life thousands of miles away. I’d love just one whom I could talk to and see in person and talk to without restraint.
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Yes. Why does that have to be so hard to find as we get older?? (Of course, I suck at manning friend usedso partly my own fault for sure…)
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I totally understand. I really don’t even have the time to make the kind of friend I’d like to have! Unless I met someone else who wanted to dive right in too…
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Yeah… it’s like you need to magically meet the right person who you connect with so perfectly that it takes about 5 minutes to become best friends!
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Exactly! Now why is that so hard?? Lol
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I know! 🙂
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Being relocate actually was the best experience ever you learning how the world works and the culture and yes it’s pretty suck to meet new people and struggling to find a real friend who can talk to but I think the ideal of living is trying to find yourself in the certain of circumstances… all I say is good luck and life can be challenging sometime but if you relocate in Asia that would be best choices SEA
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Well… I have a family (in my house and extended)… I can’t go anywhere… the friends need to come to me!
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I hear ya, Sandra. ❤
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And I appreciate you being here… ♥
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Online, anyway. 💕
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Yes. I think part of my “problem” is that the evenings… from maybe 9:30 until I go to bed (which lately is around 3am)… I’m pretty much alone. Kids are asleep. Husband is downstairs or he fell asleep or he’s watching something on tv. So, I’m alone… and that’s usually the time of day when my mind starts overthinking and magnifying everything until I’m in tears. So I guess I want the friend, yes, and it would also be great if he/she was available during my pathetically needy moments. Now, *that*, I’m sure, is asking way too much…!
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That is a long time to be alone, especially when everyone else is sleeping besides you. 💙
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I do like to be alone to write and do other things… but at night like that, for some reason… it’s when I fell apart…
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Nights tend to do that to the mind…
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I can relate to this 10000%….the night hours are the loneliest….too much quiet and not enough wine….
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Like right now, for example. I’m seriously considering going to the kitchen and eating all the desserts I baked for tomorrow… But that will end badly…
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Badly yet deliciously….
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I’m nearby! Gotta be. I’m also awake late so you should message me. Do you use Hangouts? I’ll email you.
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Yes and yes. Of course, you may regret the offer… when I’m a mess, I’m kind of a mess…
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Well we can be a mess together…at least until 2018! 😉😝
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Hahahhaaa. I’d better hone my gardening skills…
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Seriously!! 😙💨
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😕😕
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💜💜💜💜
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Wish I was there to give a cracked rib kinda hug! I’m confident I would make you cry laughing so hard. Hugs Goegeous!
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I know you would. Let me know when your plane lands… I’ll pick you up at the airport!!
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Ha!!!! You never know….hubby & I have always wanted to visit your area 😌
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It’s 36 degrees this morning… you might wanna wait until spring! I had to crawl back into my warm bed after school drop off…!
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You gotta lotta damn friends here, Sandra! Honestly, I think all the friends we have on social media makes it easy to believe a thousand Facebook friends are greater than a handful of IRL friends, but it’s not true. Our feeds are only as good as the past few posts, but a friend who will come out with you or bail you out (or both) is worth a million on social media.
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I appreciate my friends here very much. They are amazing people. But I do agree on the offline friends… and unfortunately, I’m lacking those…
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We bloggers ought to at least go to summer camp together.
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I’ll bring the marshmallows!
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I’ll bring the rum. Shh.
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I’m still working on trying to get you to Oz Sandra! I do get you. xo
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Let me know when the portal is complete. (Hey, it beats that really really long flight…!) ♥
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Absolutely! 😊
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