blogging boredom.

I’m bored with my blog. Are you bored with my blog? I am.

I had recently been tossing around the idea of upgrading my site (you know, a cheap paid plan), but I’m not sure it makes sense since I feel like I’m dying a slow death here. In fact, I’ve also momentarily considered shutting down and leaving entirely. Those momentary considerations don’t last long… but they have surfaced often lately.

Is this ‘losing interest in things I once loved‘? Maybe it is. That’s a bad sign.

I’m tired of posting about my emotional instability. And you may not admit it, but you are (probably) sick of reading about it. It’s not even helping me to write about it anymore. I’m not sure how much it ever helped… and it often makes me feel worse.

I appreciate the support, the love, and the kindness my friends have given me. I’m not sure I’d make it without that. Is it bad that I need it? Knowing people see good things in me (even if I often don’t see them) tells me that I can’t be as terrible as I think I am… even when I’m at my lowest.

And while I do also appreciate people’s desire to help, it’s hard because I don’t think most people understand that suggestions to do things I know I’m not capable of make me feel so much worse. Then, not only am I sad for my own existing reasons, but I’m also doubly sad because I can’t do what people suggest… I can’t help myself… and it feels like I will be in hell forever… and I’m a failure. And my feelings of hopelessness multiply.

I was recently directed by a friend to an instagram post that addressed this really well. [Every word of this doesn’t apply for me (for example, it’s NOT true for me that no one asks if I’m okay or need help… some people do)… but most of this fits. I think you’ll get the idea. And I hope no one is offended. It is not directed toward anyone in particular. I just want people to understand. Sometimes, I just need to be reminded that I matter… that I’m not a total loss… that someone believes in me… even when I don’t.]

“I may be in a mood or experiencing an unfavorable moment in time and post exactly how I feel about what’s occurring in my life. People will then jump into my comments to tell me what not to say or what not to do. 

They don’t even ask if I’m ok or need help. They just immediately start telling me how they think I should be feeling. 

Nothing is worse than when you’re already feeling down and someone comes along and pushes you down even further.

There are times when it may take you hours, days, or weeks to start feeling like yourself but it’s a process, a personal process, to find what works best for you during those dark days.

You can’t be positive when you feel negative. 

Telling someone to smile or think positive, doesn’t help. Telling someone to think about all the good in their life or to be grateful for what they have, doesn’t work. Being completely self-centered and not even having the decency to respect someone enough to show that you care, also doesn’t help. 

That’s why people fake it. That’s why people say they are fine when they’re not. That’s why people cry and suffer in private. Because we all know if we are honest and share that we are struggling, we will be met with unsolicited advice and/or irrelevant opinions that are rude, condescending, and uneducated. 

For the love of God, if you can’t offer kind words then be respectful with your silence and allow people to work their process in peace!”

Sorry… that was sort of a tangent. Back to the blogging issue…

The problem is… if I don’t write about that which has overtaken my life (the emotional junk), I have nothing to write. My life is empty but for everything wrong with it. That’s all I am. There should be something more to me. I want there to be something more. But I can’t find it.

I’ve tried prompts… I’ve been all over WP and Pinterest and anywhere else I can think of to find ideas. Nothing is working. I am uninspired. What is wrong with me? I used to crank out one or two or three poems a day. And they were even good! Now I’m lucky if I can write one a week and have it not suck. Fiction is dead to me. It was revived for April a-to-z (probably because that wasn’t truly fiction)… but it’s dead again. And we’ve already discussed my reality (at length…ugh).

Nothing fun happens in my life anymore. Nothing exciting or humorous. Just… nothing. It’s depressing. It’s embarrassing. I already have a huge problem with boredom and the associated feelings of uselessness and hopelessness. This blog is one of the only things I have to fight those things. If I can’t do this anymore, it’ll make things worse… not better. I need this. (Is that pathetic? You don’t have to answer… I know it is.)

But… what’s the point of my blog? Of anything I write? There isn’t one. I’m never going to have the courage to try to publish or get published. I’m not making any money from the blog. I’m not winning any prestigious writing awards (haha). And lately, I have little to say. I’m even having trouble commenting… having conversations with people.

I am so fucking boring.

On this matter (unlike my psychological shortcomings), suggestions might help. Other than prompts, how can I make my blog better? Because right now, it sucks monkey balls.

 

[Image: Disney’s Paperman… a short film everyone should watch.]

©2018 what sandra thinks

         

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About what sandra thinks

Sandra is a writer, blogger, poet, artist, emotional disaster. She thinks far too much and sleeps far too little. Sandra lives in the Northeastern U.S. but dreams of an oceanfront home in Hawaii where she could learn to surf. She loves books, brutal honesty, coffee, and the color black. She hates insincerity, beer, whipped cream, and facebook. And she is uncomfortable talking about herself in the third person.
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67 Responses to blogging boredom.

  1. I’m bored with my own blog, not yours! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. [ Smiles ] Once you are posting about the things that you genuinely care about, every thing should be okay.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I guess that’s true in theory. But the messy life stuff keeps taking over. I’m not happy about that…

      Liked by 1 person

      • [ Smiles ] Maybe, you can check out other blogs that post inspirational and motivational content (That should help to cheer you up and there is the chance of finding a solution to your problem in the process)

        Liked by 2 people

        • I don’t know… I’m overly cynical. I tend to roll my eyes at motivational stuff. I think it’s all just too cliche for me… I don’t think I could write anything like that without sounding totally sarcastic!

          Liked by 1 person

          • [ Smiles ] Okay, here is a tip: write about your experience of blogger boredom and let your readers know how you intend to overcome it.

            Liked by 1 person

            • Well… I wrote about it. I have no idea how I’m going to overcome it… which is why I wrote about it… 🙂

              Liked by 2 people

              • [ Smiles ] What type of vision do you have for your blog?

                And, are you working towards that vision?

                Liked by 1 person

                • I don’t have a vision. That is precisely the problem.

                  I’m unemployed, so making money would be great but I don’t have the kind of blog that makes money. And pursuing that is way more than I can handle.

                  Liked by 1 person

                  • [ Smiles ] Okay, Sandra. It is not the end of the world.

                    I recommend finding something that would put you in a positive frame of mind; something like listening to your favourite genres of music.

                    You cannot elevate yourself and your blog if you remained in a depressive state of mind.

                    Do take some small steps towards happiness.

                    And, it takes a lot of hard work to make a fair sum of money from blogging (Now, that wasn’t meant to discourage you, but to let you know that success doesn’t happen overnight).

                    Never give up hope, my dear.

                    Your life is not written in stone; you have the power to change things for the better.

                    Liked by 1 person

                    • In theory, I have the power to make things better. But in reality, I’ve been trying to improve my life for many years without success. I have ups and downs, but mostly downs. I’m stuck at a really low point right now. Nothing I’ve tried has helped at all… and I’ve tried everything I’m able to try. I’m out of options. I honestly don’t know what steps are left for me to take. 😦

                      Even things that used to help me don’t work anymore. It scares me…

                      I know that my frame of mind is making everything else more difficult, but if I could do some of those difficult things, my frame of mind would improve. I’m stuck in an endless loop…

                      Thank you for being so supportive.

                      Liked by 1 person

  3. Claudette says:

    I remember reading some quote somewhere during a time I felt bored with a lot of things. I can’t remember exactly what the wording is, or who said it, but I keep coming back to it in my head: if you need something interesting to write about go out and do something interesting. (paraphrased).

    but that just seems like so much effort when you’re feeling blah, right? I know I felt that way at the time. It was much easier to just tune out into some tv drama…

    still true though. SIGH.

    (maybe you just need a blogging vacation)

    Liked by 3 people

    • It makes sense… do something interesting. I wish I could. It’s the blah feeling… the lack of money… the lack of ideas for things to do. My whole life is boring!

      I definitely need a vacation… but I was thinking a beach… or Paris… 🙂

      Like

  4. Cyranny says:

    *Hugs* Gorgeous… I wish I had magic words for you, but I don’t :/ I know a lot of people here love you, and your blog. I hope you’ll feel it too. xx

    Liked by 3 people

    • I just wish I could do something interesting and fun here. This blog is just… blah. I have no ideas anymore. It makes me wonder if it’s time to stop. But then what? I don’t think I can get any more bored than I already am… and if I do, well, that will be really really bad for me…

      There must be something I can post… 😦

      Like

  5. missb says:

    How about trying out photo challenges?

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Maybe try a different direction than you’ve tried before? Perhaps looking into things that you haven’t featured on your blog before would help make it seem less boring.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Hello. How are you today? I came across your blog this morning and enjoyed it very much. I too can relate. I hope you don’t ever shut it down as I enjoy reading other’s blogs and I do tend to make friends through commenting and asking questions. Look forward to reading more of your posts. I hope your having a great week end. Annarose.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Well, I came over to see what people were saying cause I’m bored with my own blog. I want to write fiction but it always gets pushed to the side as I do all the crap I have to do each day. Then I feel like a procrastinator. But I think what people are saying on your blog is that they like reading about your varied life, including the poetry and fiction and rants and complaints. So, there, no help at all from me, sorry, lol.

    Liked by 3 people

    • That’s okay… I understand… I obviously can’t come up with anything either. I’d love to write fiction but I haven’t been able to… 😦 I also wish something good and interesting would happen in my life… maybe that would give me something to write about…

      Liked by 1 person

  9. prior.. says:

    just wanted to share that what works for me is to take a blog fast – it can be a week to a few months and it really helps prevent a funk 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

    • I think this might be good for me, but I’m worried because boredom is really bringing me down and I’m afraid to give it up… even for a while. But it might be the answer…

      Liked by 1 person

      • prior.. says:

        yes – and I must admit that it is a little hard to fast – I have felt different things at different times – sometimes withdraws – other times pure freedom and bliss. But the break always had excellent fruits. and kind of like yoga for me. when I take some time off (and maybe do once or twice a week of gentle yoga for a couple weeks) my practice goes to the next level with a bit more power or flow yoga – not that it is my goal to master tons of power yoga = cos I believe in the cardio myth – where folks do way too much cardio and hard workouts thinking it is good – ugh)
        anyhow, my last break should have maybe been a little longer, but I was missing my connecting too much and felt a green light to come back after 2 months off – but a third might have been needed.

        Liked by 1 person

        • I think I have such a huge fear of losing friends that I’m afraid to disappear for more than a couple of days. I know, that’s kind of pathetic!

          Liked by 1 person

          • prior.. says:

            no, it is realistic. And shows concern and responsibility.
            However, if you don’t freshen up that might mean you give more but give less because lack of zest.
            Sometimes we pull back and give more and connect better with less – ya know?

            And the genuine connections will bounce back with you – trust me, I know.
            Although I have lost a few connections from pauses, but the self-care and maintenance breaks really are crucial for the long-haul – and it is good discipline to fast from things anyhow….
            in the meantime, do what you are comfortable doing – it is your journey to explore.
            🙂

            Liked by 1 person

    • I like that phrase, a blog fast. A sabbatical is nice too.

      Liked by 2 people

  10. Mark Caudill says:

    I got bored with my first blog but it wasn’t going anywhere anyway. This time around I decided to do a blog on how to build a life time residual income with an internet business system and so far I’m not getting bored, it is not growing that fast but I am still plugging away at it. Maybe adding a mission to your blog would help keep you motivated.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I don’t have any sort of business idea or anything. I don’t have something like that to offer. Not sure what my mission would be. That’s the problem, I guess.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Mark Caudill says:

        You would have to look at my blog to see if it was something you might be interested in, owning a business is not for everyone and making money online is not for everyone but if your bored with blogging it could bring a new meaning and propose for blogging.

        Like

  11. Sandra, it’s a tough time for you right now and I love your honesty. Since you asked for suggestions, here are a few. 1. Read: reading is feeding the brain. Maybe read old fairy tales and comment on them or write your own version. 2. Set a tiny goal, eg do 3 fairy tales, not 52! 3. Make one change in your life, any change at all, and see what happens. 4. Look outwards, not inwards, and write to find out what you think. 5. Treat your blog as a playground not a prison cell. 6. Even though you are young, do my older bloggers survey: it will help you to understand what’s happening to you as a blogger. Best of luck!

    Liked by 2 people

  12. jrvincente says:

    I’m not bored with your blog!

    With respect to publishing: I am intimidated by the whole publishing process. That’s why I started publishing my own ebooks on Amazon (etc.). It was easier. If you ever want help with that, let me know!

    One writing thing that I do when I get stuck writing fiction is start narrating boring things. “He got into the car. He buckled his seat belt. He turned on the car. The hot air blew on his face and he pulled out of the parking spot, only to get hit from behind.” Oh, hey, something interesting happened! 🙂

    That’s what works for me, and if it works for you: awesome! If it doesn’t, I hope you find what does work for you. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you so much.

      I don’t think I have anything written that’s ready to be published… I don’t know if I ever will… Maybe someday.

      That’s a good idea about the writing. I did start writing random stuff that has happened over the past few days. I made it into a whole post. But I never posted it… I feel like I talk about myself too much… but things just keep happening… not usually good things… 😐

      Thank you again. ♥

      Liked by 1 person

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