I thought I lost you
because when I woke
you were gone.
But…
I could never lose you
because you
were never there.
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what sandra thinks 
Love it. I’m seeing a theme developing here. Keep at it and I reckon that’s your writing hiatus broken.
Hugs.
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I hope so. I don’t feel as inspired as I’d like… but maybe it’s getting better…
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Oh so sad! 😦
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Poetry… for me… much easier to write sad stuff. It always seems to turn out better than happy stuff.
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You do the sad very very well. But its still sad and makes me feel sad emotions lol but you are great at it!
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Thanks 🙂
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Ohh. This makes me sad. But that’s a good thing because it means that you stirred emotions. 😚 Love it!
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Thank you… At this point, I’m just glad I can write *anything*…
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*anything* is always good!
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🙂❤
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It’s sad that so many people deal with this. It’s not easy at all.
Love the post!
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Thank you!
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Hear that sound? It’s a heart breaking. 😕
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I’m sorry… These are the things that come out of me…
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I hear ya’, but you don’t have to apologize. Glad to see you writing, regardless of the tone. 😊
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Me too. I still don’t feel like I’m “back” though. Maybe I’m getting there…
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Baby steps, my dear. Some is better than none, no? 😊
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Yes… that’s true. I’m just cranky because I’m having pain issues. 🙁
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Again? Or do you ever get any relief from that?
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My back felt better for a day or so. The pain is never gone. But it was pretty bad again today. I keep doing the PT exercises, but nothing has changed since before I started PT. What’s the point? 😦 And then there’s my foot… I have no idea what’s wrong with it but sometimes it hurts across the top. That’s been really really bad today. I don’t think it’s possible that anything is broken since I have had this pain (usually mildly) for quite some time and there was never any trauma that caused it… not that I can remember, anyway. It’s really f-ed up because it doesn’t hurt if I massage my foot… but it hurts when I walk. Sometimes. And sometimes a lot… sometimes barely at all. WTF??
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If I had to guess, the foot pain is related to your back. If there’s any nerve pinched it’ll refer to that motor point. Don’t give up on the PT. Have you been back since we talked about it the other day?
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No… Tuesday. I’m just so frustrated… and really sad. I think I’m always going to be in pain and I don’t want to go through my whole life like this. Can’t seem to fix it though. I talked to my NP (the mental health one) about this. She said chronic pain certainly contributes to depression. Hell, for some it’s the main cause. So, really, it all rolls up into one big fat suck. It’s hard for me not to wonder what I did to deserve all of this…
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You don’t deserve it. Nor do the innumerable patients I’ve worked with over the years. I know you don’t want to on bunch of meds, but a consult with a pain mgmt doc may be in order. Pain sucks, and can certainly affect ones mood. I see it every day. 😔
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I don’t know. I’m sick of all of it… appointments for my back or my brain or whatever the hell else happens to me. It’s just copays but I can’t afford it… and nothing I do helps anyway. Seems pointless.
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Don’t give up. 😕
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I think I know who you are talking about….
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This is very sad, but it seems like you’re getting back to writing poetry at least, so I’ll be happy for that! Even if the theme is sad… And I’m sorry to hear you’re still in pain. That does suck. Beach is right about the foot pain being connected. Don;t give up on your exercises – they really do help, it’s just not a quick fix. ❤️
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I just feel like hell… 🙁
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Oh sweetie! I’m sorry… 😕
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I’ll live… just maybe not without pain. It feels like I’m going to be in pain forever. For years, I just assumed I had to live with it so I didn’t really do much. But then I decided I should ask and here I am… doing what I’m supposed to do… but I’m still in pain. The foot thing… that’s worse than before. Occasionally, the back feels worse than before, too. Sometimes, I feel like I shouldn’t even bother. But living with this sucks…
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Chronic pain is no joke. But like I said, the exercises aren’t a quick fix. Give it a good long try. And if in a reasonable amount of time, they haven’t worked, seek a second opinion. There may be something else going on that needs to be addressed. But don’t give up. The answer could be out there and you just haven’t found it yet.
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What’s a long try? It’s only been a month…
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That’s not that long. I just rehabbed a shoulder injury – it took from May to about October until it was completely healed. It gradually improved though. A month is just a start. Soft tissue and especially connective tissue is a slow heal.
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I figured it wasn’t long enough. I’m just frustrated and down because I don’t feel any improvement at all. A few days ago, I had one of the worst days in a long time. I can’t afford to keep going to these appointments forever… and I’m tired of the pain…
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I get that… but when you begin asking your body to do things it isn’t used to, it will complain! the trick is getting used to it – aka stronger. Hang in there! It’s early!
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Thank you… I appreciate all the info! You guys are so good… 🙂
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Happy to help!
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Well written Sandra…..hey, there’s a beautiful life ahead for you…..everything will be good….
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