I know, this is my third w post. Which is amazing because at 2am, almost 19 hours ago, I had no idea what I was going to post for w. But something happened today that made me write this.
I have been a little miserable lately. But I’ve kept it off my blog. I hope I’ve been successfully deceiving all of you (but not in a horrible lying bitch way). There’s just too much — my unemployment situation, family stress, and so much other crap. But I am going to do my best to continue to suffer in silence because I really just don’t want to be a downer. And to be honest, sometimes, talking about what sucks makes me feel even worse. I realize denial is never a good solution but lately, for some things, it’s the only option that makes things bearable.
Early this afternoon while trying to figure out what the hell starts with x, I heard my mail carrier outside my front door. Our paper mail, at this point, consists of junk mail, occasional catalogs, and random items that are actually legit. Today, I received a small square envelope from my sister in NYC. Paper mail is not dead in my family.
None of these details about her are especially necessary at the moment but… she is one year older than I, she lives alone, never married (other than to her job), no children (she never wanted any). She has always been the caretaker, mediator, peacemaker, helper in our family. And she has always been generous.
The square envelope…
Inside was a card that I found crazy-appropriate. Amazing because I haven’t talked to her for a few weeks so she doesn’t know my life has been extra sucky lately. In fact, she is not the ‘emotional artist‘ type that I am. She has always been calm, even-tempered, great with people and very optimistic and positive. I’m working on that but… you know, work in progress. So I don’t often get into very deep discussions with her about feelings and such. Yet the card that showed up had a phrase on it that I find myself thinking far too often…
And then I opened the card, expecting something witty. She can be pretty funny. But that’s not what it was. Her completion of the ‘What if?‘ phrase was something else…
“a kind soul gave you a check for $_____ today?“
(I will not divulge the amount, but as I said, she is generous. And I was stunned.)
I cried. Even writing this now, I’m tearing up again. Yes, she has always been overly kind and giving, but this was just… beyond…
Of course, I contacted her immediately to thank her… and now I want to do something for her in return. But obviously, spending money makes no sense. I’m sure I will create some sort of lovely thank you to paper-mail to her… but it hardly seems like enough.
what sandra thinks 
So lovely! Wonderful to have a close sibling.
And I was just in NY a couple weeks ago for the first time…taking in that same view.
Wishing all the crap dissipates soon for you. 🙂 I can relate.
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Thank you so much. She is one of my 3 sisters… and being so close in age (15 months apart), we’ve always been close. I am due for a visit to NYC to see my sister… but money is kind of an issue at the moment!
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NYC is expensive!! I’ve chosen not to look at credit card receipts…I pretty much ate the whole city. 🙂
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That is one of the best things about NYC — the food! I keep a list of places where I’d like to eat in NYC. I’ll need about a month there. 🙂 My generous sister would probably let me stay with her, of course. And take me out for a couple of meals, I’m sure. And the rest of the time, I could just live on coffee. 🙂
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Well, if you want any restaurant tips, I’d be happy to tell you the awesome places I ate. 🙂
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I will remember that whenever I figure out when I can make my next trip!
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If you scroll through my posts of a few weeks ago, you will see about 10 posts journaling my trip to NYC. I think you’d like to read it, and see the pics!
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Ooh – I will take a look!
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Stories like make me jealous, and a little sad to be an only child.
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I do love having sisters. I would have loved a brother, too, but that just wasn’t in the cards… my parents had 4 daughters. Although… I do have one sister who doesn’t speak to me (or to my younger sister) at all. None of us are sure the exact reason. There’s always one nutball, I guess. Not that you’d be the nutball since you’re an only child!! I would never imply such a thing! But I do say that to my husband often… he’s an only child, too. 🙂
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Oh, I’m the nut all alright. But it wouldn’t prevent me from speaking to my siblings. 😃
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What a wonderful surprise!
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It was truly an amazing surprise. I still can’t believe she did it!
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Have you talked to her after receiving her card?
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She was (of course) at work. She works a LOT. I left her a message and we texted back and forth… And I must have said thank you 50 times…
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She must’ve known at some level that you needed a ‘lift’. 🙂
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Sadly, she probably did because that seems to be a frequent state for me lately. “Lift-needing.” 🙂
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There’s certainly no shame in that. Is it fair to say that the two of you complement each other?
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I think so… we are opposites in many ways. Though we do have things in common as well. The big stuff, though, it seems she is what I’m not and vice versa.
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That is just so lovely and heart warming. It made me smile to read.
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Her timing was just perfect… and she didn’t even know it!
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I love when things like that happen!
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That’s so lovely.
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🙂
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That’s really lovely xxx
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🙂 Still makes me cry!
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Aww, sisters have a special connection. I know my sis and I do. That’s wonderful. I bet she’s glad to be able to share monetarily and I’m sure you share your family with her. Sweet!
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She does love being the “cool aunt” and, of course, the generous aunt!
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But you’re the cool mom!
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I think my kids think so… since I love to make them laugh… and I love to bake… 🙂
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How could you not be, you are so fun!
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Aww, thanks! I think I really needed to hear that. I have not been feeling especially fun lately… (in hiding anyway!) 🙂
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C’mon, you are so talented and fun and funny. I panicked when I thought you weren’t posting, before I realized I just wasn’t seeing them. I look so forward to your poems and stories everyday!
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Thanks… you are so sweet! I’ve just been buried in a lot of stress lately and sometimes that makes me feel like I’m too much of a disaster to do anything right!
And it’s midnight here… and I have nothing written for the letter X yet!
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I’ll be glad when this challenge is over, I’m stressing over blogging, too, which is so wrong!!
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I know what you mean. But I’ve been so focused on the damn alphabet I feel like I won’t know what to post when it’s over!
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I know what you mean. Maybe we should find more challenges
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I thought about it. I do have quite a few poems I wrote during this one that I rejected, though. I may see about reworking some of those. That will get me going again, hopefully!
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I need to do something to keep going. I need built in motivation — maybe not every day 🙂
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Yeah… I should probably stop telling myself I must post once a day. I think if I stop, I worry everyone will think I’m gone and abandon me. Wow, that sounds pathetic!!
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How sweet 😊
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🙂
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Oh my god. The universe (or whatever) provides. That is off the chart cool. You are so lucky to have a close sibling, I’m an only child. If you get to NYC you totally have to let me know. It’s such an easy drive from here! 😃
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I keep saying it, but I’m still so stunned that she did this… and it still makes me cry (in a good way). I love how she says to “do something special with it” when she knows full well all I’m going to do is deposit it.
Maybe I will get a mani-pedi. Or a massage. Yeah, I think I need the massage more. (A massage like my story? Yes please. Does that cost extra?)
I will definitely let you know when I finally get to NYC!
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I too have 3 sisters. Completely out of contact with the eldest – the first – who went into a monastery 20 years ago.But there is hope … ☆
So: What if ? or: «What would we do without» ?
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The one of my 3 sisters who doesn’t speak to most of us is also the eldest. How strange!
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This is so sweet. I have two sisters, and I love the special sister connection. Enjoy her wonderful gift 🙂
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Thank you. I have three sisters… but one is crazy and doesn’t speak to half of her family (myself included) so it often feels like I just have two. And they are both wonderful people. 🙂
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That’s too bad about your third sister. But she’s the one missing out. I’m glad you’re close with your other two. The sister bond is like nothing else! I was so happy when I had my second daughter, because I know how great it is to have sisters. And my girls are super close 🙂
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That’s so wonderful! I have a son and a daughter, nearly 3 years apart. He’s at an age where he wants her to leave him alone sometimes, but she worships him! It’s adorable. 🙂
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Aw, I love that! Sweet siblings. It’s so much fun to see how their relationships change over the years 🙂
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Definitely. I imagine the high school years will be fascinating… 🙂
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Oh yes!!
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That’s so kind of her. I didn’t know you were suffering, you hide it well. But I am glad to know that someone noticed and was able and generous enough to help. If you ever need anything, a friend, support, anything. Feel free to contact me.
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It’s strange and amazing timing on my sister’s part because she knows I have a lot of stressful crap in my life, but she didn’t know I’ve been doing extra-crappy lately.
It’s easier to hide things here than in-person… (of course it is…!) And I worry too much about looking weak with my sad little issues. I know so many people have it worse. But thank you so much for your kindness and friendship and for being so sweet. It means a lot to me! ♥
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I know how bad life can be. 💕
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♥ Thanks for being so supportive.
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Of course.
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Aww, how lovely of her! I think sometimes the universe has a way of knowing we need a pick me up and connects all the dots. 🙂
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🙂
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Hope things get better for you soon!
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Thank you!
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I love the ‘just in time’ sentimental gifts. How amazing! Sending you virtual hugs and praying for you to have less stress.
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Thanks so much!!
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Lovely gesture. Regarding the oither stuff of life, try to confront your problems head on. I wish you well. These things won’t go away. We are going through crap as well, we are side by side tryng to recleve the crap and move on. You will too. No storm lasts forever. Be well.
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Let’s hope there’s no forever storm!
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There isn’t. It only feels that way.
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Yes it does feel that way. Certain crappy things… I can see an end in sight. Others… not so much.
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They will all end at some time. I hope they all end quickly for you.
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