
You broke her heart
when you disappeared.
You didn’t even
make it quick…
You were slow
and calculated
and cruel.
You gave her hope
and pain
all at once
until finally
you disappeared.
You never even said goodbye.

©2017 what sandra thinks
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About what sandra thinks
Sandra is a writer, sometimes blogger, poet, artist, emotional disaster. She thinks far too much and sleeps far too little. Sandra lives in the Northeastern U.S. but dreams of an oceanfront home in Italy, but she would settle for a non-oceanfront home in Italy. She loves books, brutal honesty, coffee, and the color black. She hates insincerity, beer, whipped cream, and facebook. And she is uncomfortable talking about herself in the third person.
I knew a girl like that once. She was certainly a contributor to my trust issues. 😏
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This one is more about the high school guy… And yeah… It kind of messed up my ability to trust anyone…!
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Yeah, mine was freshman year of college. She did a number on me. I already had walls built up anyway, and she laid the final bricks in that wall. Took years for my wife to chisel them away. Still some there to this day. What an asshole. 😃
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I’m sure it’s all part of why I have trouble believing anyone ever really wants to be around me… friends included.
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Mine started in childhood, divorcing parents, dad moved away and married his affair partner, then my mom had a string of guys coming and going, depending on opportunity and need. The girl from my freshman year was just a brick in the wall, but she broke my heart. I was a much harder but to crack after that. And I was a hard enough nut to crack already. What got me was that I had a hard time letting my guard down prior to her. With her, I did. Then I got shit on. Made me think “Never again!”.
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My HS guy never actually broke up with me. He was hot and cold and I didn’t know what was going on. He was my first ‘real’ boyfriend… and I was his first ‘real’ girlfriend… so maybe he just didn’t know how to end it. But still… he strung me along for a couple of months. Some days it seemed like everything was good… other days, he was distant. He wouldn’t tell me why… then I found out he took another girl to some party. They were ‘just friends’ and he was back with me the next day… but he slowly (secretly) kept seeing his new friend. And eventually, he was with me less and less until finally, he never spoke to me again. Never actually told me we were done… nothing. And I was just a stupid naive teenager… I should have ended it myself weeks before…
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I ended mine. But not before getting my heart, and trust, stomped on. I’d had enough. Funny thing is, I didn’t see her again for like 3 years. She tried to reel me back in. I had already started living with who I’d eventually marry, so that was a big fat no. If I were a dog, I’d have laid her properly a given her some hope, then kicked her ass to the curb. But I’m not, so I didn’t. 😏
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I had some pretty major revenge fantasies. But of course, I never did anything. He went away to school and I saw him twice after that when he was in town (didn’t see him intentionally)… and I haven’t seen him again since.
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Easy come, easy go. I’d have regretted sleeping with her I’m sure. But if I had been single at the time, that’s likely exactly what I’d have done. Still would’ve felt bad. But it’d have been sweet in the moment. 😃
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Yeah… guilt is a problem for me… I guess I’m not enough of a bitch… 🙂
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That’s never a bad thing. The world has more than enough bitches and bastards to go around. 😃
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Brutal honesty that many can sympathise with. Lovely yet sad poem.
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Thanks so much.
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Slow and drawn out … ouch.
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Some people are just cruel…
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Yes …
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Ouch, that is going to be brutal. ❤
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Yes… very cruel.
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