please stop me.

flood.

Caught in a flood
rising around me,
sneaking above me.
But I’ve taken
all I can bear.
Please
don’t let me drown.
I cannot swallow
anything more.
If only you would
Stop
feeding me pain,
taking my love,
my kindness,
every beautiful part of
Me
and tainting it
with a darkness
I cannot bring to light.
When the very last
speck of bright shiny hope
turns dark inside me,
there is no cure.

swirl.

I try to separate myself from the things that break me. The people who break me. But too often, when I finally realize I need to separate, it’s too late. The damage is done. There are some things that cannot be reversed. No, you cannot “change anything if you put your mind to it”. They’re like scars. And not the fucking cliché kind of scars that “I love because they make me who I am”. I don’t love them. They remind me of pain.

dots.
© what sandra thinks
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About what sandra thinks

Sandra is a writer, blogger, poet, artist, emotional disaster. She thinks far too much and sleeps far too little. Sandra lives in the Northeastern U.S. but dreams of an oceanfront home in Hawaii where she could learn to surf. She loves books, brutal honesty, coffee, and the color black. She hates insincerity, beer, whipped cream, and facebook. And she is uncomfortable talking about herself in the third person.
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42 Responses to please stop me.

  1. I feel your pain here. Some things can’t be undone, nor swept under the rug to be forgotten, or forgiven. Just gotta chalk it up, say “Fuck it” or “Fuck them”, and then move along, I suppose. Easier said than done though, huh? 😕

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I can relate to this so well. 💖 😢

    Like

  3. I’m with you about the scars stuff. The only thing I will say is that with scars t least you survived. a little damaged but still going. Would I willingly give up any scars i have and undo the damage? Hell, yes. Do overs are most welcome. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Eric says:

    Right here with you, Sandra. 💔 much love to you.

    Like

  5. VictoryInTrouble says:

    Big hugs, I think we can all relate to this. It’s probably half the reason a lot of us write. We feel things deeply and the effect is lasting.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Miriam says:

    Powerful, haunting, beautiful, sad … you have a way of making what we all feel sound inspiring. Big hugs to you Sandra. xo

    Liked by 1 person

  7. mandibelle16 says:

    Hope you find a way to breath Sandra. Hope you don’t drown, and find that light that takes you to the top of the water where you can swim to shore and hope. Scars always hurt, at least the ones I’ve had do. People think they’re good and sometimes they are, it means you healed when it could have been worse. But they nag at you, and remind you and as you say “Still hurt you.” I guess try to see past the pain, and see how your scars have healed from jagged wounds, to what they are now. Best of luck my friend.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Dark, powerful write.

    Liked by 1 person

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