My favorite quotes.
This is not going to be some horrible motivational garbage. That crap makes me wretch.

It’s also not going to be another recounting of my favorite lyrics. I did that. I could do it some more, but I think I need to move on.

•  •  •

Sometimes, someone will say something that hits close to home. Or makes me laugh. Sometimes, both. And often, the things that make me laugh make other people merely smile. Or maybe even not react at all. Maybe they are not my people.

I tried to rack my brain for this post. But my memory is crap so I only came up with a few. I guess these just stuck with me on a higher level than some others. Or maybe a lower level, depending on your perspective. In fact, often the ones that make me laugh the most kind of need to be taken in context so maybe they’re only funny in my head… where they are in context.

Let’s play a little game. I’m not going to tell you the sources of these quotes. I wonder if you can figure them out. I think they’re easy… but maybe that’s because I know them.

“It’s nothing personal. I don’t like anybody.”
“Belief implies a level of giving a crap that I’m never going to achieve.”
[Those are both from the same source. Which might as well be me. Easy.]

“I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman.”
[Very easy.]

“Uh, guys, try out this couch. Nice. This is some real butt candy.”
[Maybe less easy.]

Am I immature because ‘butt candy‘ makes me laugh every time?

“I can’t remember anything. It’s like I need Google for my brain.”
[You’ll never get this one.]

Have fun guessing!

p.s. — My least favorite quote is not from a specific person. It’s not even really a quote… it’s more of a ‘saying’, I guess. It’s something that makes me want to punch someone in the face when they say it: ‘It is what it is.’ Oh god, I fucking hate that so much. Uh… Thanks Captain Obvious. It’s so stupid. Shut up.

         
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