31 questions | it’s over.

The end.

Now that March is over, I thought I’d say a few words.

Some of the questions didn’t really spark anything in me. I’m sure you all enjoyed my responses anyway since I’m so charming. *cough* Some of the questions pulled a lot out of me. I’m glad because I needed it. I’ve been struggling lately. For months, things have gone from bad to worse. I can’t catch a break. And I can’t give myself a break either.

This month helped me get out of my head a little bit. It got me writing, even if some of what I wrote wasn’t very inspired. That’s what they say, though, isn’t it? Write anything… as long as you’re writing. I hadn’t been heeding that advice at all before March. I hope it sticks and I keep writing. I’m not optimistic, but then, I never am.

writing in darkness

Question I want to revisit:
March 30What’s your most urgent priority for the rest of the year? I wrote about being a better mother, but I think I need to be in a better place myself before I can truly be a better mother. I’ve dismissed my own well-being for so long that getting better is an overwhelmingly huge undertaking. I’ve tried tiny steps, but they are so small that I really haven’t moved at all. What’s it going to take? I fucking wish I knew.

Revelation:
March 9Has a teacher ever changed your life? How so? I never realized that the two most influential teachers in my life actually changed my life for the worse.

Most difficult question:
March 22What’s your personal anthem or theme song? Believe it or not, despite my great love for music, this was hard for me. I spent a long time searching and listening before I settled on the song I thought fit me best. I started at the most logical place—The Smiths. I probably listened to their entire catalog, but nothing was quite right. I was looking for something that said something about me, not my relationships. I think [eventually] I found the right song.

Question that made me laugh (even though it wasn’t meant to be funny):
Tie:
March 4Are you living your life purpose — or still searching? Hahaha! Hilarious! I am so far from knowing what the hell my purpose is that I might as well just quit life. And I’ve lived a good chunk of my life. I should know by now. Or at least have an inkling. I don’t.
March 8Do you think you’re currently operating at 100% capacity? Oh, man, possibly even more hilarious. I’m probably at about 4%. And that might be a generous estimate.

Question that made me feel like a horrible person:
March 24When you see peers / competitors getting things you want, how do you react? I struggle with this—both the reaction itself and that it is, in fact, my reaction. It’s especially bad when it’s something I want that they get but didn’t even want… they didn’t even try. I wish I could be happy for others without it totally ripping apart my insides.

My favorite question:
March 16If you could sit down with your 15-year old self, what would you tell him or her? If only I could really deliver the letter I wrote to 15-year old me… and take my own advice back then… so I’d be a better human today.


p.s. — And now I start April A to Z. Sick of me yet? Maybe I should start looking for something for May so I can really freak you out by being here so much. I’m like a parasite.

[Thanks to my lovely friend Marquessa for this 31 questions challenge.]

         
©2021 what sandra thinks

About what sandra thinks

Sandra is a writer, blogger, poet, artist, emotional disaster. She thinks far too much and sleeps far too little. Sandra lives in the Northeastern U.S. but dreams of an oceanfront home in Hawaii where she could learn to surf. She loves books, brutal honesty, coffee, and the color black. She hates insincerity, beer, whipped cream, and facebook. And she is uncomfortable talking about herself in the third person.
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22 Responses to 31 questions | it’s over.

  1. I am so glad you made it! I am actually considering the A to Z challenge because I’ll be at home for the next few weeks. But still probably not haha

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ogden Fahey says:

    its been fun to see you posting regular! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I real!ly enjoyed all of your responses Sandra. Thank you

    Liked by 1 person

  4. M says:

    Thanks for participating Sandra!!! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Chin up Sandra. Things going from bad to worse serves, at least, as a source of perspective and creates a situation within which the prospect of things going from worse back to bad again is intoxicating.

    Some of those questions were challenging, to be sure – expectations of the year? Are you kidding? My expectations of today are very vague – I have no idea of what lies beyond the fog of next week, let alone December. I have no idea where I’ll be at the end of either. I like it that way.

    Like

    • Oh, how disconcerting to think that things going badly is a good thing. But I see your point.

      I have a problem with expectations. I should probably set some for myself so I have some sort of goal, but if I set no expectations, I won’t fail to meet them.

      Like

      • I used to professionally test people in another life and deliver reports on them. I always wanted to write (but never did) that ‘This candidate sets himself a very low standard which he consistently fails to achieve’.

        Something to aim for.

        Liked by 1 person

        • You would not likely be familiar with a very old tune entitled ‘Born Under a Bad Sign’ which has the very negative, yet amusing central theme that says, “If it wasn’t for bad luck, I’d have no luck at all”.

          I’m not sure if that’s relevant to this conversation, but it seems so to me.

          Liked by 1 person

  6. jrvincente says:

    I love this wrap-up! I wish I had though to do something similar, but I’m behind on A to Z and I probably won’t get to it.

    Also, I’m strongly considering after posting daily in March and that I will be posting daily in April…maybe I should continue posting daily. Wouldn’t that be fun? We should find some kind of blog challenge for May…

    Liked by 1 person

    • I was thinking the same thing! I want to look for or come up with something for May.

      I am not so far ahead with A to Z… I have only written A B and C. I’m going to fall behind if I don’t get going. You’d think ‘my favorite’ would imply, like, one word answers, but that is so very far from my reality!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Miriam says:

    Looks like I came in right at the end of your challenge. Congrats Sandra on writing for the entire month, I think that’s brilliant. I think I only managed two posts for the entire month of March. Happy April. You know what they say “things can only get better.” 🎵😊

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Congrats for this!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. mydangblog says:

    I didn’t get to them all, but the ones I did were stellar!

    Liked by 1 person

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