I know I’ve posted this song before, but I heard it today and it kind of got to me in a big way. So… maybe listen to it again. I think it’s worth it.
Wake Me Up | Avicii
I tried carrying the weight of the world
But I only have two hands
I hope I get the chance to travel the world
But I don’t have any plans
I wish that I could stay forever this young
Not afraid to close my eyes
Life’s a game made for everyone
And love is the prize
[partial lyrics]
Written by Melinda Marie Marantz, Aileen Quinn, Mike Einziger, Avicii & Aloe Blacc
I am not currently winning the game… or earning any prizes. I think I lost the instructions… a long time ago.
Obviously I am not the owner of any rights to this song, video, or lyrics… just everything else… ©2019 what sandra thinks
what sandra thinks 
There you are!!!! What the hell is up?!? How are you?
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Hey. You must have missed my last post before this one. I kind of thought you wrote me off or something. No, not really. I’m not even sure how much of an update that post was… can’t remember exactly what I wrote and I’m too lazy to go back and read it.
I’m okay, I guess. Or, well, maybe that’s a lie. Hell, I don’t know how I am! A mess, I guess… as if that isn’t obvious. I am having a hard time. Lately, I wonder “what’s the point?” and I have no answer.
Well… that was bleak. Sorry. You’re probably glad now that I haven’t been around!
Now I feel like I should delete this comment and start over…!
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Blow you off? You know better than that. And, I still say this place is better with you around. I’ll go check the previous post now. I actually am having one of those weeks…or three…myself. Whatever could go wrong, has. I’m in a funk, man. So, now that I’ve cheered you up….. 😏😏
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Yeah… I know. But I’m so annoying. Like, if I wasn’t me, I wouldn’t want to be around me. Hell, I *am* me and I don’t want to be around me. So I am always stunned that anyone does. But I’m lonely and I’m sad. Was just talking about this with my NP today. It’s not great… I feel like I’ve kind of given up on happiness. I’m too old… I’ve run out of time… and I guess I’m tired of fighting. I often feel like it’s better if I’m not around because I’m kind of unpleasant. You know? I’m sorry shit has been going wrong for you. Where the hell are the cliches that make me want to punch you?? 😄
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Hahaha! I’m all dried up on the rainbows and butterflies at this moment, sorry. I’ll likely be back to my annoying self once it’s above 50 degrees and doesn’t get dark at fucking 5:30!!! Damn, winter sucks donkey balls. 😒
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I’m not happy with winter either. I never used to hate it but the short days and the cold are getting to me. And let’s not forget that fucking Valentine’s Day is coming soon enough… a fake holiday to remind me just how alone I really am. Fabulous. 😐
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Yeah. Valentines Day is a load of bullshit. Manufactured holiday. Meh. 😝
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Seriously. I don’t need a special day to emphasize my loneliness. It screams pretty loudly on a daily basis.
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It’s a lovely song.
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I think so, too.
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I’m into acoustic versions of songs right now and this song has a really nice version – https://youtu.be/M_o6axAseak 🙂
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I like that version… thanks for sharing! I love acoustic versions of songs, too. Well, usually. Some artists are better than others, of course. I like this version, too … https://youtu.be/6MiAQVJH0rQ 🙂
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This is a great song. Good to see you, Sandra. I wish you’d hang around more – I miss you!
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Thanks Meg. I’m trying to be here more. Some days, I don’t know, I just can’t. Some days I just can’t with anything. I wish something would just miraculously change. Like, in my head… or my life! I miss you, too.
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Still hoping something changes for you! You deserve some sunshine, girlfriend ❤
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Thanks ♥
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I love this song. I found out about what happened to Avicii the other day and it was kind of heartbreaking. The important thing isn’t winning the game–it’s having pieces on the board.
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It is sad about Avicci. So young. I’m not sure I have pieces on the board. It feels like I’m just out of the game… like I’m not even playing anymore… like maybe I’m so tired of losing that I don’t want to play anymore. I guess I’ll just watch.
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Sometimes it’s ok to take a break and watch from the sidelines before you’re ready to go back in there:-)
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I’m sure you’re right. 🙂 I may have to start over, though. That’s an intimidating thought!
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Hey!
I was thinking about you 🙂
Is everything better? last time I was here on wordpress things weren’t so good. How are the kids!!!!
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Aww… hi! That’s so sweet of you to think of me. 🙂
The kids are good… but they have both been sick over the last week. Getting better, finally.
For the most part, things haven’t changed much, to be honest. But I don’t want to be a huge downer. Maybe that’s why I haven’t been around for over a month. I feel like a burden to the world.
But… your comment made my day. Thank you so much for thinking of me. Life is a little less lonely now. ♥
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There’s always something to make life a little less lonely. I’m sorry about that, maybe you should adventure a bit, pack some food and find a fort or hill near you and go off and adventure!
The other day I was so lonely while walking up this mountainside, and this little black dog joined me near a lake, and I’m not kidding, he followed me all the way up to the pass I was going to, which was thrity kilometers on. And on my way back, the next day, we crossed a hotel and he left me there, I think that was his home. Still though, it almost seemed like a miracle. and I’ve never exactly been fond of dogs.
Why were they sick?
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In sorry it took me so long to reply to this. I’ve definitely got a problem with loneliness. It’s hard because I’m lonely even when I’m not alone. Sometimes, it’s worse when I’m not alone. I’m not really the outdoor adventure type… but maybe I should change. Not sure I can… there are just so many obstacles. Anyway… I’m sorry for being so… down? blah? I’m not sure what I am. But I appreciate you very much!
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NO PROBLEM WITH BEING DOWN! Is there nothing that makes you excitable ?
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I don’t know. My life has become pretty empty. I take care of my kids… do whatever they need me to do. I take care of my house. I take care of my husband even though he’s a butt. And that’s really it. Sometimes I read. I used to write but I seem to have lost my ability to do that. I honestly don’t know what excites me. Someone asked me, “What’s your passion?” And I couldn’t come up with an answer. I just don’t know. I guess that’s why I can’t seem to pick myself up… I don’t even know what would make me happy. Not realistically, anyway.
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I wrote a poem a few days ago that could be applicable to you
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I assume it’s posted? I will check it out. Thanks for thinking of me.
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IT IS INDEED. HELLO!!!!!
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Hey Sandra, I was just thinking about you and kinda missing seeing you around. Hope you’re okay. Big hugs from my side of the world. xx
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You are the sweetest. Thanks so much for thinking of me. ♥ I’ve been having a lot of trouble writing for so long that I’ve given up. I feel separated from everything… like I don’t fit anywhere… so I guess I’ve kind of closed myself off. Sometimes I want to open back up but other times I think it might be better this way. I always think I’m going to try to post something or visit everyone… but then I get buried in my thoughts… thinking that I don’t have anything relevant to say anyway.
Sorry… that was probably more information than you wanted…! Thanks again for thinking of me. It means a lot to me. ♥
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Never too much info Sandra. I reached out cos I genuinely miss you. Don’t be scared to open up again and put something “out there”. No one here judges and we all love you and your writing, otherwise we wouldn’t be here. Sometimes we just gotta say “what the f” and do it anyway. Write whatever, it doesn’t matter what. I’m always here for a hug and a chat okay. xx
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Thanks so much. I know you’re right… I should just write… I just wish I could be more than my issues. But I feel like that’s all I am right now.
Thank you again. I don’t know how to tell you what it means to me to know someone is out there thinking of me. I’ll be honest… I figured everyone forgot all about me! So thanks. ♥
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No way! Sure we all get busy with life and all but when you make a friend, even virtually, that doesn’t change. I’m here and I’m thinking of you. How, just write. Even if it’s on Insta, I saw you put some photos up, yay, you go girl. 🙂
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Yeah… school break is this week… went out for late breakfast with my daughter. Should not have spent the money or eaten the carbs… but… oh well… too late now!
I think I’m just too negative and needy so I assume the worst. Maybe I will try to write and post soon. I do need *something* in my life for me. Something changed in my brain and took writing away from me. I don’t know if I can get it back.
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Yes you can. Just keep pushing. You’ll get it back.
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