Is ‘fiction tuesday’ really so bad? I’m thinking I’m never going to come up with a new name for this. Maybe I don’t need one…
back to you. part 7. [previous: part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6]
“You know, you’re not supposed to be here,” Dani said with a smile as she handed Finn a cup of coffee.
He smiled back to her and touched her cheek. “I know. But I wanted to see you. Besides, you’re not wearing your wedding dress.” Finn defended his morning visit while unknowingly distracting Dani from the confusing thoughts swimming around in her head. Until he spoke again. “I think it’s fine.”
The moment Dani heard those words, her smile vanished. ‘It’s fine.’ Fine wasn’t good enough. She didn’t want anything to be fine. She hated that Finn just said that. She took a deep breath, not wanting him to catch on that something was bothering her. But it was. She couldn’t get Adam out of her head.
The silence between Dani and Finn dragged on for an uncomfortably long time. Finally, Finn couldn’t ignore it any longer. “Dani, is something wrong?”
She took a deep breath before she spoke. Talking to Ava the night before was supposed to clear her head, but it seemed to have done the opposite. “I’ve just been thinking about some things.”
“What things?” Finn grew concerned.
“It’s nothing,” Dani avoided his question. She was still sorting it out and she knew he was not the person she should involve in her thoughts. “I’m fine.”
There it was again. That word. Fine. Dammit. Dani’s head told her she should be happy. She had this wonderful man who adored her… who would do anything for her… but she was a mess. She tried to put her uncertainties to rest. She could have a good life with Finn. She was lucky to have him. But her heart said something else.
If a life with Finn was the making of Dani’s wonderful future, she should have been content. Not troubled. And definitely not fine. She desperately wanted to feel peace. She wanted to want that life with Finn. She wanted to feel as sure about it as he did. It was right there… laid out in front of her. All she had to do was take it.
Dani tried to ignore the things that crept into her mind. She tried to dismiss any thoughts that made her doubt her life with Finn. But today was her moment of truth. If she couldn’t erase the doubt, she would never be happy.
Dani and Finn walked out to his car. With a smile on his face, Finn pulled Dani into his arms. “I love you.”
“I know you do… but you need to go. I’m supposed to be inside with Mom.”
“I think your groom will understand if you’re a little late. I’m pretty sure he’s so happy nothing could get to him today.” He kissed her.
Dani smiled and hugged him, but the uncertainty stayed with her. She closed her eyes and tried to turn off the rest of the world. But she couldn’t. Finn’s words came from his heart but they weren’t in Dani’s. So happy nothing could get to him? Dani didn’t feel happy. Not like that. She felt scared and confused. And shouldn’t Finn have been able to see that? If he was right for her, shouldn’t he have known just from the look in her eyes that she wasn’t feeling what he was feeling?
Dani tried to relax in Finn’s arms, but she struggled. She knew what she had to do and it made her more anxious than she already was. It wasn’t even a solution but it was something. And she needed to do something.
She needed to see Adam.
©2017 what sandra thinks
I can’t imagine that feeling. I wasn’t scared at all. It felt so natural. And yes, if my wife had been that unsure or scared, I’d have noticed. Now, let the fireworks begin. Curious to see how raucous things get here. But, I do feel bad for Finn.
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But he should know. Finn, I mean. If he doesn’t know how she’s feeling, maybe he’s too caught up in his own feelings to notice… which is bad… you know?
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Yep. It borders on narcissism. Love is supposed to be generous, not selfish. Yes, he should sense her apprehension. And if he truly loves her, he’d let her go if she wasn’t happy, not try and trap her.
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But then again, sometimes one is blinded… but then again, this is kind of important…
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Indeed it is. Though, nowadays, it seems less important. Just divorce when something better comes along. I NEVER wanted to go that route. I’d have stayed single forever rather than go through multiple divorces. I told myself I’d do the marriage thing once. If it didn’t work out, never again. I still feel that way.
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I really don’t know how I feel about that… other than feeling like I’m too old for any of it. Oh… and for the record, neither my husband nor I were scared or unsure when we got married… but our relationship is not fabulous now. Sometimes, you just don’t know. I don’t mean to paint a picture of me in hell… it’s not like that. I just feel like there’s not enough… something.
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I hear ya’. People change and drift and all of that. There really is no way to be certain it’ll last forever. But if there’s hesitation at first, should end it right then. The cases of people being unsure but having it turn out great are likely very rare. It should be the easiest decision ones ever made, right? Oh, and I wasn’t making any reference to y’all, just the story and similar situations. I don’t doubt y’all were good initially. What changed, or when, I have no idea, of course. Can you pinpoint it at all?
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It was definitely after we had kids… but a reason? I don’t know. Maybe it was/is me…
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Also… I didn’t assume you were talking about me… I was just throwing that out there. 🙂
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😊😊
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I really feel for Dani …
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It’s a no-win… somebody ends up alone… and it’s kind of up to her…
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Yes, it’s an awful situation to be in.
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Oh my nerves! I feel bad for both of them now! But even though it will hurt Finn, so would her marrying him and not loving him the same way he loves her! This is excellent, Sandra. I’m loving the story, the drama and the suspense!
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Thank you… I’m glad you’re enjoying it! I finally have a story that’s sort of fully mapped out… but I keep thinking of things I should add… This is what happens when I make it up as I go…!
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That’s why we call it a first draft! The finished product (at least for me) goes through 4-5 revisions before I’m completely satisfied with it. You’re doing great and I’m really happy you have the bones of the story mapped out!
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I still have an ending situation. I mean, I have one… but then I kind of have another… and then there’s the whole thing where I hate ending anything…
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I know how you feel. Maybe the end of this story could lead into the beginning of another though!
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That would be good. Although if I always get attached to the main characters… and at the end of a story, their story is usually resolved… and I don’t think I want to fuck with it. But there is Ava…
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And Finn… you have written a really nice guy – just not the guy for Dani. Maybe you could write his story!
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True… I’ve got to think more about who he is… same with Ava. Sometimes I don’t devote enough time and thought to all of my characters…
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Well you’ve got us all emotionally invested in Adam and Dani so… excellent work!
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Thanks 🙂
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Omg, I need to catch up!
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I hope you enjoy it if you do! 🙂
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I am confident that I will 😊
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🙂
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It’s kind of a messed up situation. Can’t wait to see what happens next! 🙂
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Thank you!!
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Sad, cause you know if there are doubts this big on your wedding day, something is wrong! You’d think Finn would want more enthusiasm from his bride? I have to say I never had a doubt when getting married and I don’t think hubby did either. And I still don’t. That doesn’t mean there haven’t been some bad times, some counseling, tears, yelling, threats — wait, where was I going with this? Oh, yes, we’ve managed to work thru whatever!
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Yes… Finn said he loved her… she said ‘I know.’ That’s never good.
I had no doubts when I got married. Looking back today… sometimes I wonder… sometimes I don’t…
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I think there were times at the beginning when I expected a fairy tale and real life happened and I might have questioned what I did. I mean, I married a much older guy with three kids and child support payments! The ex was a pain in my ass, but I was always younger, maybe prettier and definitely nicer, so that helped. To be honest, she didn’t set the bar very high 😉 so she wasn’t a tough act to follow!
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I think a lot of us expect, or at least want, the fairy tale in the beginning. Damn you, Disney… you broke us! It’s hard not to want that when you see it in movies… on tv… when I write it… lol
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Oh, sorry, I got so caught up I forgot to tell you how much I’m enjoying your story 🙂
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Thank you so much. It means a lot to me! ♥
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Hmm….good one!
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Looking at some of the comments….never underestimate the pull of apathy and denial. Denial for Finn, refusal to see what he does not want to see. Apathy for the bride – it takes a lot of effort to swim against the current and stop the wedding….
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Oh yes, I agree
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“I love you.”
“I know you do….”
should have told him something at least.
I am going to really regret it when I get to the point of not having a next instalment. It will be like reading a book and finding the last chapter missing (which happened to me once!)
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Love is blind… and sometimes deaf!
The last chapter was missing?? How awful! I think I’d be throwing the book across the room if that happened! (Provided it was a real printed book, of course.)
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Bought in a charity shop and I never noticed until I’d read all the way through. I did find another copy though.
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See Adam?! Horrible idea!! The good kind of horrible 🙂
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Haha! 🙂
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