I’m kind of late… but it’s still Saturday… so I’m not really late…
g | group texts
When I was laid off from my job, I wasn’t alone. My whole department was released. So of course, there was the inevitable go-out-for-a-drink-all-together-before-we-go-our-separate-ways night. I had to go. Two of these people were good friends of mine. [I guess they still are… I just never see them. Or talk to them.] I was friendly with everyone else, too, but I really bonded with these two.
If you know me at all, you’ll know that night was hell for me. Unless one of those two was talking to me, I sat in awkward silence trying to figure out what to do with my hands… hoping I wouldn’t choke on my drink because I was so self-conscious. I’m just better in small groups. Like, no more than 4 people. Including me.
Inevitably, the group wanted to get together again post-layoff. You see, normal people are social. They want to hang out… have a drink… catch up… have fun. Only it’s not fun for me. It’s a fucking anxiety-ridden nightmare. I kind of freak out the moment there’s an invitation.
And what could make it even worse? I’ll tell you: When that invitation comes in a group text message. Are you kidding me? Eight people on a text message is annoying as fuck. Especially when I was finished with the conversation after the first message. Because if you know me at all, you know I’m not going to go to the fucking party anyway. But, of course, I continue to get beeped about it… over the next few hours… the next few days… and again closer to the event.
Does the 5th work?
The 5th works for me
Works for me, too
I can’t do the 5th. How about the 12th?
I can only do the 5th or the 19th
I can come on the 12th
Oh forget the 12th
Forget the 5th, too
What about the 19th?
I can’t come on the 19th but don’t change it for me.
UGH. Shoot me.
And the former co-workers I don’t have in my phone… all I see is a number. I don’t even know who the fuck is talking! And, of course, because these things make me so anxious, all I’m waiting for is the date they finally settle on so I can politely decline the invitation.
So sorry everyone… we’re going to be out of town that weekend. Miss you all! Have fun!
Several weeks later…
Hey guys. Are we still on for the 19th?
Yeah what can I bring?
I’ll bring dessert.
I can’t cook. I’ve got chips.
Need anything else?
I’ll be there
Can’t wait to see you guys!!!!!
Hope the weather’s nice
Hey everyone. I’m still in.
See you all soon!
UGH. Shoot me.
I know it’s the most convenient way for all of this to get worked out. Sure, the party host could just pick a day and invite everyone. But then it might not be the right day. But that’s what I would do anyway. Just pick a day. And I’d spend days designing the perfect invitation. And I’d send it to each person separately. You know, if I ever had a party. Which would never happen. [Not like this… family birthday parties for my kids are pretty much my limit for parties…]
Sigh.
The next time my phone starts buzzing its way across the damn table, it better Publisher’s fucking Clearing House desperately trying to contact me to give me my $5000-a-week-for-life prize.
I’ve been campaigning against this since forever. Thanks for giving this a voice.
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You are very welcome!
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I always feel like a turd if I’ve missed out on one of those group text conversations. Is it weird to feel like I’ve let them down by not participating? Granted, I’m only in on two group texts, but one is with my three closest friends. That’s the one I feel bad about not being around to respond. The other is a work one, and I was put on that list unknowingly, so I don’t much care about that one. Like you, I don’t have a name attached to those numbers, so I don’t have a clue who fuck is saying what. 😃
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I’m just such a hermit… and when these things come up, I feel bad for not joining in… to the conversation AND to the party. So guilty. I’m sure they think I’m a giant bitch. But it’s not that I think I’m too good for them or anything like that. It’s because I feel socially awkward. And also… at this point… thoroughly embarrassed at how long I’ve not been working…
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Maybe I’m weird, but I just don’t socialize with my co-workers. I even eat lunch by myself. And I’ve worked with most of them for 12 years now. I just keep it compartmentalized and at arms length. So, you’re not alone. 😊
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That is exactly how I am. Well…. was. It’s kind of sad though… because I have no friends and it’d be nice to have one. Work is the only place I ever meet people. I think the problem is that I want 1 friend… just 1… but people have more friends than just me and I struggle being around more. I hugely prefer one-on-one.
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I bet you’d be surprised how many people are the same. Just wanting one, maybe two friends. The three that I have are long-term friends, but that number, plus spouses, is almost over-stim for me when we’re all together. So less is best. 😃
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The best friend I have right now is someone I met here. I just wish we could go out for a damn cup of coffee or something, you know? I don’t know how to make friends offline. Plus around here, everyone already knows how pathetic my life is so I don’t have to pretend or anything…
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😊😊
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Not possible long ago I sent a group text just to family with an update on one of my surgeries. My stepson was on the list and my brothers and sils started writing back and forth just being stupid silly. My stepson called his dad 3 times cause he was going to bed early and they were bothering him with their texts. He wanted me to take him off the list. It was pretty funny but I got how annoyed he was cause you’re trapped. Now I try to just forward the text! 🙂
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It’s a pain in the ass to send the messages separately. I do understand that… so I get why people group text… but I feel your stepson’s pain!
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It is like the maze at Ikea. Once you’re in the group text, I don’t know how you get out! Ooh, I wonder if I should write about Ikea for I? Or perhaps you could do a brightest on my behalf. God, it’s so hard to get out of that store. Sorry, I digress…
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Shoot, that damn autocorrect, lol. I meant Bitchfest….
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I knew exactly what you meant! 🙂
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Dude… no matter what I do, I ALWAYS end up looking down as I walk and seeing the arrows pointing the opposite of the way I’m walking. I cannot get that place right! I think I could bitch about Ikea… I’ll think about that. I don’t think I have any ideas for I that I actually like…!
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Excellent!
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I loathe group texts!!!! I think a lot of us will bitch right along side of you on this one. 😕
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It’s a nightmare… especially if you’re antisocial like me… ☺
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This sounds like a nightmare! I have never had the displeasure of a group text, but I do hate being in a facebook group message. At least thosev I can leave. Or the best ones where its just one line to inform people something and there is no need to reply at all and everyone just reads it and then ignores it. Those are perfection
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I can’t deal with facebook at all. lol
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I have started to distance myself from it. It’s been very refreshing! I really only keep it now to keep in touch with certain people
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I don’t know if this is help you… When this happens though I usually send a separate message to the ringleader of the texting asking them to let me know when they pick a date. Then leave the group chat. 🙂
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Except if people keep replying and they don’t all specifically remove me, I’ll get all the messages anyway!
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Good one. It’s like being held hostage! And I only recently realized I could turn leave the conversation. Boy is that a relief!
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How can you leave if people keep replying and you’re on the message? Everyone would have to make sure they removed you before replying…
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There’s a function on iPhone that lets you opt out of the conversation. In effect you remove yourself.
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That’s cool. There’s probably something for Android that I don’t know about so I just suffer… lol
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I’m sure there is. The option is right within the recipient list. It might be the same for Android.
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Next time…!
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Everything here… I am NOT a group text fan!
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They suck! I’m not even a fan of group emails…!
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