e | emojis
I hate the word. And I hate them. Oh… I give in and use them… and I hate myself a little more every fucking time. I don’t want to use them. I feel like a child when I do. It makes me cringe and I’m desperate to stop. But how can I? I have to use them, don’t I? I have a tendency toward sarcasm… and, well, you know… bitchiness. Without those stupid little faces, my tone may be lost… I may be misunderstood. I’ll be offending people all frickin’ day long. So… what then? Get rid of the fucking emojis and the sarcasm? Ha! The latter is not going to happen. I don’t even think it’s possible without a lobotomy.
Do you know who loves emojis? My 9-year-old daughter. She and her friends are capable of having entire conversations in emojis. It’s horrific. And for fuck’s sake, they made a movie. I shit you not. A fucking emoji movie. Ugh. And it gets worse (seems impossible, I know). Patrick Stewart is the voice of poop. Professor X. Captain fucking Picard. Is. Poop. The world truly has gone mad.
What the hell was wrong with ascii? [Fuck, I’m old.] Such creativity! Now you can’t even use a simple colon and parenthesis because they get autocorrected to a fucking emoji. It’s a goddamn conspiracy! Can’t I just be left alone to smile : ) or pout : ( or cry :’ ( or laugh : D ? Can’t I just stick my tongue out : P or be shocked : o or be emotionless : | or uncertain : \ ? I want to wear my shades B ) and maybe even summon Homer Simpson (_8^(I).
Even naughtiness is possible… for girls and boys… ( , Y , ) 8===> 
Making things simple is not an improvement. Not in this case. Everything’s better when you make it from scratch…
And what about asterisks? Those were essential before this emoji hell fell upon us. All you had to do was say what you felt… surrounded by asterisks. For example: I should have been in bed hours ago. *sigh* I’m going to be in hell tomorrow morning. *sob*
That’s so much more charming than a fucking hideous yellow face.
(No offense, Homer.)
°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸,ø¤°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸
[Disclaimer: I do not intend to offend. If you love and enjoy using emojis, knock yourself out! Hell, I end up using them, too. I certainly don’t and won’t hold it against anyone.]
what sandra thinks 
😃👊🏻😂🍻
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I knew this was coming. LOL Ugh… see… I just typed : ) (without the space… so it would become a smiley face)… it’s a habit now… I hate that!! 😛
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Hahaha! I couldn’t resist. 😃
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I am not at all surprised. Ha!
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Annoying people since 1968! 😃
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That’s one cute cat! (Not sarcastic, so no need for a wink emoji.)
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Haha… I can’t take full credit. I did make it but I saw a picture somewhere. I don’t think I could have made that without assistance! (And I almost typed at least 2 ‘faces’ just while writing this comment… it’s not like I’m going to be able to stop no matter how much I may want to! Stupid reflexes.)
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I’m still impressed by the cat you made even though you saw the picture before. I can totally relate to having to suppress the urge to use emoticons. Heck, why stop myself? 😁😉☺😋
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It’s very difficult! I tried to resist for so long but when you see them everywhere, you start to feel rude not using them!
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I agree! Especially when one is being sarcastic. I suppose writing ‘wink wink’ at the end of a comment would be an alternative, but that takes too long.
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Yeah. I think that’s why I kind of liked it better before there were options! Ever notice how “improvements” are so often not improvements??
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Windows ‘upgrades’ are a great example of improvements not being improvements at all!
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I hate emoji’s too. Love this post, great rant and practical solutions.
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I’m glad you enjoyed it! Sometimes, I just think I need to write like a grown-up, I guess…
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Aww, I love certain emojis. Like the naughty ones. 🍆🍑 😈 And the kiss- 💋. And all the hearts. I think the hearts make people feel good. They make me feel good. 😊 Here’s one for you ❤ 😛
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Hahaha! I agree — they do make people feel good. If I never saw one again, I’d probably start to think people hated me. LOL They do serve a purpose. But for some reason, I don’t like that *I* use them so much. Doesn’t bother me when other people use them. (Well, to the extent my daughter does… that’s just crazy!)
I think I’m somewhat old-school in some ways and I liked the creativity before it all became so standard… I mean… ( , Y , ) those are cute boobs! (_|_) A little bum? And you know, boy parts… 8====> Haha! I actually don’t even think of the heart as being an emoji because I can make it on my laptop by just hitting alt-3… it’s like a regular character. ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
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Ha ha, I like the bum. I never did these other old-school ones. I’m not sure where I was but I didn’t start texting until a few years ago.
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Either that or I’m just really old. Or had fucked up friends. Or both!
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I think we’re about the same age. I just didn’t text, lol. I love it now though! 😄
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I’m pretty sure about the friends back then though. Haha
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I’m learning so much more about you! I love it. And here are a few emojis for your viewing pleasure!😎😍😘😆
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You’re learning what a bitch I am! I really hope people know these bitchfest posts are exaggerated. I’m not going to freak out if I see an emoji… or even a cliche. And there’s no way I can stop using emojis… you kind of need them at this point! ❤
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I’m just teasing. And you say everything I think in my head! And I LOVE it!
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I’m glad to hear that! I do still worry that I am going to make some enemies this month!
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Don’t worry. If they have no humor, too bad for them!
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True!
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Oh… and I’ve got disclaimers all over the place!
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Lol of course!
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Oh my god I have to show you my Dalek… well not MY Dalek, but some clever soul (nerd) made a Dalek out of keyboard symbols. Hang on….
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Damn it, I can’t post it here in the comments. I’ll tweet it to you
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I saw it! I used to know how to do a whole bunch of things… my memory sucks, though…
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I like Emojii things… Whatever they are. What I hate is the damn Slefie sticks.
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Oh… I hate those, too!
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Once again, you make me laugh. Cannot wait for the letter F!
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It’s 10:10pm and I still don’t know what the fuck (ha) I’m writing for F. I have one idea but I’m not sure it’s good enough…!
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I used to dislike emojis until I discovered the side-eye emoji. I side-eye everything multiple times a day so it’s nice to just let the little yellow face do it for me. That emoji has saved me from developing frown lines. I owe it everything, lol!
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Haha… I love this comment! I admit, I do have a few favorites even though I often feel that I’m not acting my age using them. The side-eye is one of them… and straight-face… and only eyes. Ahh! See? I get sucked in!
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Pingback: experiment and regret. | what sandra thinks
I can’t stand emojis! They don’t always translate well between platforms, so there is often a miscommunication. I feel like I’m talking to a child and want to scream at them “USE YOUR WORDS!!!”
~Mary
Jingle Jangle Jungle
#AtoZChallenge 1970’s Billboard Hits
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That’s how I sometimes feel! And when I get the little boxes because my device doesn’t have that emoji… I have no idea what’s happening!
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So the other week I was en route to our quarterly financial meeting. The CFO was running late so he texted “start without me.” The Controller texted a thumbs up….problem was, the CFO didn’t have his reading glasses and he misread which finger it was. LMAOOOOOOO MOST INTERESTING FINANCIAL MEETING EVAH
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That is awesome!
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It was. HAHAHAHAHA
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Lol!!! This is great! I feel the same way! Like you have to have some emotion if your humor is dry. Also. Lets be honest.. we can get away with saying a little more when that little face is on there!!! Haha!
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Always glad to make someone laugh! And you are so right — we do get away with more when we include that little face…!
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